Have you ever been in a conversation, and at some point, beginning, middle or end, you have a moment when you realize that God intended for this conversation to happen? He meant for you to be there, meant for you to hear specific words that he desperately needed you to hear. It's kind of like that mentality that one has as a teenager...nobody wants to hear what their parents have to say, however if someone way cooler than mom or dad said the exact same message, it all becomes so much clearer and we have reached immediate enlightenment?
I had the pleasure of that experience tonight...I was invited to a party for a husband of my boss...a lot of corporate schmoozing, which makes me want to puke, but just as I had reached my fill of the semi yummy hors'devours and free riesling wine, I was saying goodbye to a previous director of mine, who had been laid off earlier this year. *Two thumbs way up, economy* Im not sure if it was all of her Merlot talking or if she really meant it, but she gave me the biggest hug and we began a conversation that found me still seated there 45 minutes later.
She and I had shared a secret bond while working together. Shh...don't tell...we both love Jesus...which unfortunately is not as popular in my office as some other disreputable things...like "diversity" parades....but it was nice to have an understanding that someone in this corporate monster knows that there is a greater purpose out there.
She began to discuss how much her life had changed and how she had grown immensely since having been sliced and diced in the great layoff of 09. She spoke very real emotions to me and was honestly speaking from her heart about how, each step of the way, her human weakness would want to crawl back in to bed and cry, but how God was there, taking each step with her. Back in April, this lady told me she sat down with an index card, wrote down everything she wanted in a job. Every detail was there, down to having an office with windows...and from that day, she prayed that God would grant her the desires of her index card...heart? She wasn't afraid to lay before God exactly what she wanted...and after a long hard summer and just as the severance was running out, God granted her this hearts desire...
Im not sharing this story to say God is a genie...you make 3 wishes, he kind of sounds like Robin Williams, and life is perfect once again...Im sharing it because I have a hard time just laying it out...I hate asking God for things I want...I feel selfish and like I dont deserve it...what I fail to realize is this is all a part of that faithfulness...God is a gracious father, who wants to pour out his blessings on his children...but just like the dad who makes his child work to earn that bike, God wants us to learn some lessons along the way. But first we need to learn to trust him. If we don't have faith that he is going to move in our lives in a powerful way, all our prayers are just performance for those who hear them. If we are faithful, then He is faithful.
Im not foolish enough to know that next week, God is going to throw a million bucks in that old bank account. But through this conversation, I have learned that it's ok to tell God that there are things you want in this life. Its ok to pray passionately that your hearts desire be in his will...He wants us to seek Him faithfully, because when we stop doing that, we continue to try to earn things by our own power, and that is an impossible task.
Take this challenge with me. If there is something in your life troubling you....job, money, family, marriage...whatever burdens your heart, write it down. Index Card, Prayer Journal, Bar Napkin under your rum and coke...wherever you are. Write it down and make it a matter of prayer every day. Keep your eyes open for God moving in your life, and He can do wonderful things.
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