Beautiful Things

Have you ever sat back and watched your life complete what feels like a full circle? I truly believe this is one of God’s greatest Moments of Selah with us…when he gives us the perspective to sit back and rewind with him to see that he had it in his hand the whole time.

 Like watching our favorite movies, we smile with him in the sweet parts, laugh until tears roll down our faces at our stupid mistakes, and cry fresh tears anew when we remember the pain and heartache that season of our lives held for us. We also begin to blot away those tears, or maybe even release new ones of joy, when we see where the circle landed.

I was talking with my husband the other day and half laughing, half feeling the old stings of pain when I think back to where life had us around a year ago. We were about to embark on one of the darkest seasons in our life together as a family and had no idea what was in store for us. A year ago, October 1^st, I was blindsided and let go from probably the most destructive company and manager I had ever worked for…and as Satan On Stilettos walked me to my desk and allowed me to gather my belongings, I remember this great heaviness on my heart, as though I had let the world down. I had no control…I, the great list maker, plan writer, sticky note liver by-er, had no idea what life held for my family in the next weeks and months…

If you had told me then that my family would pick up and move to Nashville, that we would leave behind some of the greatest friends we had ever known, that we would also encounter some of the new incredible friends, and experience such a peace in life and a healing in our marriage and family that really passed our understanding, I might have called you crazy and walked away…

…If you had told me I would be pregnant, I would have smacked you first for being so cruel, and then walked away…(this one takes some explanation…stick with me…)

For the last two years, my husband and I, but mostly I, have been struggling with not being able to have another baby…It went from being something we kind of wanted to, something we really wanted, to something I began to hate myself for not being able to accomplish…I took numerous tests every time I was just a couple days late, in the hopes that maybe this time, it wasn’t just a screwed up thyroid gland restricting my cycle from happening…maybe this time, it might actually be a baby…

And this is where we come full circle…almost a year to the day of all that uncertainty, my family has celebrated one of the greatest seasons of peace we have ever known and…we will be celebrating the 2 month birthday of our daughter, Mackenzie Kate Serenity. Some people laugh when they hear this big name for such a little girl, but for our family, it holds so much meaning. Mackenzie Kate is her foundation of strength and a new start…Serenity is for the complete peace we feel as a family, seeing where God has taken us from where we have been. Its almost as if she herself is a celebration for us, in the culmination of the last year. The joy we never expected, but the blessing God chose to give us…

At this time last year, we went to the Catalyst conference on the grace of some very good friends. It was there we saw and fell head over heels with the music of Gungor. Their song, Beautiful Things, has been resonating with us the last year and as we celebrate the birth of Mackenzie, it really rings true as her anthem for life…

"Beautiful Things"

All this pain
I wonder if I’ll ever find my way
I wonder if my life could really change at all
All this earth
Could all that is lost ever be found
Could a garden come up from this ground at all

You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of the dust
You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of us

All around
Hope is springing up from this old ground
Out of chaos life is being found in You

You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of the dust
You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of us

You make me new, You are making me new
You make me new, You are making me new

You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of the dust
You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of us…

As we celebrate this October 1^st, we’ll know that beautiful things have been made out of our dust…He has made beautiful things out of us…